Monday, March 14, 2005

Parent Coaching

I'm not quite sure why the New York Times is out to get contemporary parents--or maybe we're out to get ourselves. I'll link to the parenting coach article because it's good blog form, though you've probably already seen it. But while I try not to fall down the slippery slope of parent bashing (Andi is my super-ego on that one), I'm kind of amazed that anyone needs a coach to answer these questions:

What should she do when Skylar resists doing chores? Should there be limits on how he spends his allowance? Should Forrest get dessert if he does not eat a healthy dinner?

Let's see: 1) Don't let him play until they're done. 2) No.* 3) No.**

* Their allowance is their money and their (developmentally necessary) opportunity to escape your rules. If you don't want them to learn to make their own choices, why give them an allowance?

** Though it is your right as a parent to define a healthy meal as a bowl of noodles, three bites of chicken and three baby carrots.

That was easy. Maybe I should go into business.

[M and E amended my answer to the allowance question to say that he should be able to spend his money on whatever he likes, so long as it is appropriate to his age, but they both let out a resounding "No!" in response to the dessert question. M was significantly more draconian than I am on the question of chores--she thought his allowance should be cut: "If his allowance is a dollar and he has seven chores, they should cut his allowance seven cents, or maybe seventy cents."]

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