I have a bit of a crush. It's on someone outrageously inappropriate but quite adorable. Luckily, he's inappropriate enough that the idea of actually acting on my crush is inconceivable. Plus I have no interest in acting on it.
He has a crush on me too, I'm quite sure. I think it's harder for him than it is for me.
What I like, though, about having a crush, is the thrill it adds to daily life. Sometimes I think I might see him, and then I have to decide whether to take additional steps that might make seeing him more likely. Sometimes I do; sometimes I don't. It's a bit disappointing when I think I might see him and then I don't. It feels quite triumphant when I think I might see him and then I do.
Sometimes he just shows up, and I get all excited, but I can't show it, because we can't admit our crushes. We have to play calm, cool, and collected. I think I do a better job than he does, but maybe I'm deceiving myself. Certainly he does not do a very good job.
Yesterday I drove downtown to do an errand and as I was waiting to turn left, he turned right onto the street I was on from the street I was turning into. I didn't think he saw me, but I got all excited. Five minutes later, as I was driving home, there he was again, driving the other way. This time he saw me and honked. I smiled, waved, and kept going. Then I wondered if he had turned around so he could see me. Then I wondered if I should have stopped and talked to him. This crush thing can take a lot of mental energy.
[Of course S knows. In fact, he's the one who told me it was ok to blog about it.]
1 comment:
Oh my. Does he have very dark bordering-on-curly hair that kind of needs a haircut? And wears glasses sometimes?
Oh wait. That's my crush. My pretend crush. I made him up. Doesn't he sound cute?
Did you know "crush" became a verb after we grew up? You're crushing on him.
Post a Comment