Here you have it: we pessimists are doomed (funny that this article doesn't reference Sunday's). [Edited to add: But wait! I'm over-educated! I will live!]
But really what I'm here to talk about is Lisa Belkin's nanny article, about which I was quite determined to say nothing, but C said--and I quote--she was counting on me to comment, so I feel I must oblige. If you didn't read it, and I'm not sure it's worth reading, the circumstances are thus: Lisa Belkin had a nanny with some red flags; she finally got rid of the nanny after a weird incident; several years later the nanny, now a nurse, was charged with assaulting patients in an Irish nursing home; Belkin went to the trial where the nanny-nurse was found guilty. In the article, Belkin tells the story and describes her feelings, lots of feelings.
Basically I think this is just more narcissistic upper-middle-class liberal white woman nanny guilt, expiated in the pages of the NY Times Magazine. Even though Belkin calls attention to the problematic nature of the mother's desire for the nanny, she still enacts it, and, worse, in my opinion, she turns Noreen's fairly tragic story into a story about herself: how she misjudged Noreen, how Noreen betrayed her, how she angsted about her relationship with the victims' families, how she tried to help Noreen by writing a letter to the judge explaining that Noreen had big problems and needed help not punishment (and then, surprise, Noreen's lawyer refused to use the letter). There's also something...I'm having a hard time finding the word here...tacky? despicable? queasy-making? about the way she reveals Noreen and all her secrets in print (Econo-Girl makes a good point about the nature of trust). In short: standard-issue NY Times nanny-employer (can I saw employatrix?) bullshit.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
23 comments:
I hated this article--it was indeed tacky, queasy-making,and despicable. I especially hated how she insinuated that Noreen knew her secrets (but didn't share them), then proceeded to share all of Noreen's, as if as punishment for N not sharing them with her earlier. I had the cynical thought that she was only publishing the piece so she could write off her airfare.
Yes, this article made the whole idea of journalism-as-personal-narrative seem sleazy. I wanted a shower afterwards. Lucky for me that I read it while still in my pajamas.
I don't know... I saw this one as more the editor's failing than Belkin's. I can see why she personally became totally obsessed with the case, and I'm just not sure why her editor ok'd the pitch, especially since Belkin's inner conflict about writing about it is all over the piece. I found that subtext more interesting than the narrative anyway.
I must admit that I read the article with the absolute intention, or curiosity, of a nosy neighbor. The defensive descriptions of how she hired a stranger with a shitty reference, and missed other clues, were shallow and disingenuous: she never fully explained what her failings were, or why she made her mistakes. Yet she was determined to figure out The Nanny.
The graphic description of Noreen with the huge needle, and her intense weilding of it, were truly scary.
I kept reading, though. What queased me was the way she befriended the victims' families without revealing her circumstances, and then told them once she knew them. Her claim that they didn't mind is absurd.
The absolute creepiest part is that I finished the article, reflected for maybe one second on its contents, and immediately forgot it. It was too overwhelming for me to consider the mommy mistakes, the violence, and the glossing-over of so much.
"tacky? despicable? queasy-making?"
I opted for the colorless "disturbing". So much so that I actually had to write a letter to the editor -- not that I expect to see it printed. See below:
Lisa Belkin's article is extremely disturbing. She has made herself an authority on the psychology of mothers with high-powered careers. Now we know that at least one of them is hypocritical, vindictive and exploitative. It's no news that one takes a risk in hiring a babysitter, but it is quite eye-opening to learn that a Times writer would appeal for clemency on behalf of a sad young woman, then turn around and blazon her shame to the world in a punishing cover story. Noreen Mulholland's big mistake was simultaneously to mock both Belkin's maternal and professional acumen with one stinging remark: "Wow, did I put one over on you."
What's "queasy-making, I think, is the serenely oblivious cruelty of the Times establishment. One still somehow expects the Times to be basically moral. Is it really goodby to all that?
Mark Shulgasser
(not a mother, but I have one)
i know this girl from childhood she was beaten by her brother repeatedly and there is so much more i know about her that isnt good yes her mum had a stroke in the lounge and she was left with brother who beat her up repeatedly and lots of failed relationships i was only 15 when i was dating her for 2 months and seen enough that i went asap in my heart i know the truth she needs help ......i moved away at 16 and came back at 35 and i started to wonder when my family wouldnt speak about her and that made me wonder but all other friends i asked about they told me thanks to yahoo search i have been reading this and i am not surprised
I was a nanny who knew Noreen well- or as well as a person could, really. She was extremely intelligent, funny, kind, and generous. However, I too encountered a dark side to Noreen when we had a conflict over a man I had broken up with whom she wished to pursue. I think Belkin's article was perhaps more about the emotions a person experiences when they discover that someone they knew-- someone they trusted with their children-- turns out to be a killer. It's frightening, and perhaps something that she felt the need to exorcise her inner demons in order to give voice to the fears that pervade the thoughts of working moms everywhere. Personally, I could relate. I'm sorry if you couldn't.
Turns out to be a Killer ? Noreen was never charged with murder, a conflict over a man so this makes you think shes a killer get real, What i really though was scarey was the way in which Belkin befriended the people involved and never mentioned to them she was also at the same time taking noreen to dinner and offering support, I myself am a mother of three and trust Noreen with my life as i said before anything for a story !!!
hello
I recently remembered my friend Noreen of many years ago and tried to find her unsuccessfully on the net until today....and I am deeply saddened. We were nannies together in that area of suburban New York, but we loved our jobs and the children we cared for. Noreen was funny, kind, quick-witted, intelligent and ambitious. She was the only one of us who had not left children behind to pursue a better life for them in the States. Everyday she would give us an encouraging word while we waited for the school bus and "our children". I knew the guy with whom she was in love and wanted to marry she gave him her all. I really agree with him...had he married her and not let his mum choose for him this would never have happened. He loved Noreen to no end, The Noreen I know loved people and it may have been years of hurt and pain and a life that took an unexpected turn, having to leave the US after so many years...the disappointment in Mark.... that may have caused her to snap. But she was and will remain my friend...our friend. I don't excuse the incident but that is not the Noreen I know...and I give way to the Noreen whom all of us knew....She could not have put up a facade with us for so long so we KNEW her! There must have been a trigger. I will find my friend and hug her and love her and help her heal. We sympathize with the families affected but she has not commited a crime One more thing Lisa you probably forgot to mention the selfless hours of unpaid time Noreen would have put in...and her taking care of your entire family lock stock and barrel. Noreen is not the monster you've painted her to be. So we say say Noreen hang in there love until we meet again!
Noreen lives in portadown N.Ireland Andrea
Noreen lied.... lied and lied and lied, compulsively,
shes scum and shes dangerous
if you befriend her, she will hurt you, no one matters to Noreen apart from herself, she robbed and destroyed her family,
Also Belkin is the worst writer I have ever read, realistically, Knowing Noreen? NOBODY knows Noreen, apart from her, and shes so dark and twisted, im sure her own view is distorted aswell.
HERE HERE YOUR 100 PER CENT RIGHT !
STAY WELL AWAY FROM HER DANGEROUS IS NOT EVEN CLOSE THE ONLY PLACE FOR HER IS JAIL
She is the scum of the earth and deserves the same treatment she dished out. She is one devious bitch
Maybe shes not getting on well with her life how a collage let her in god knows and married to some victim she met online ah well only a matter of time before she slips up again EVIL INSIDE AND OUT
If i were her i would be keeping a lower profile Revenge is a dish best served cold
The other Annoymous i think i know you Hello Lol Thank god we have no more more contact with that monster Wow did she pull the wool over our eyes
Post a Comment